June 5, 2014 1:03 pm -

Glenn Beck says he went after Van Jones because God told him to. He didn’t even know who Van Jones was, but when he heard the name he instructed his staff to look into Van Jones and New Orleans. Now he has the same feeling about a report the Justice Department will relaunch a task force on domestic terrorism, and we must listen because God directed him correctly on Van Jones.

“I really don’t know how we figured out Van Jones,” Beck said. “That was not from man, I really don’t think.”

Beck says he simply heard Jones’ name and somehow immediately knew to instruct his staff begin to investigate Jones and ties to Hurricane Katrina, which led to Beck’s amazing discovery that Jones and ACORN were responsible for the failure of the levees in New Orleans during the hurricane in order to wipe out all the records and cover up their massive corruption.

Obviously, given that record of accuracy, we should all be very alarmed by Beck’s gut feeling about these new reports as well.

Can we please just stop giving credibility to people who use God as an excuse? This is the converse of “The Devil made me d it.” We are supposed to be impressed that special people get special messages from God. Stop using God like this. Just, stop it.

D.B. Hirsch
D.B. Hirsch is a political activist, news junkie, and retired ad copy writer and spin doctor. He lives in Brooklyn, New York.

No responses to Please, Please Stop Saying God Makes You Do Things

  1. William June 5th, 2014 at 1:21 pm

    I think you’re just jealous Alan. Unlike Glenn you can’t cry on cue.

    • Shades June 5th, 2014 at 4:51 pm

      I read he admits to using Vicks Vaporub to bring the tears.

  2. Shades June 5th, 2014 at 1:46 pm

    Satan is a scapegoat and God is an excuse.

  3. William June 5th, 2014 at 1:55 pm

    I’m wondering how many republicans are going to run in 2016 because God “chose” them.

    • granpa.usthai June 5th, 2014 at 5:06 pm

      can’t say for sure yet, William, as some Republicans are not always completely honest, but I would keep an eye on the 6th candidate to make such a haphazard proclamation for it is written: ‘… it is the number of a man’.

  4. genderman June 5th, 2014 at 3:31 pm

    God told me to invade Iraq.

    • granpa.usthai June 5th, 2014 at 4:51 pm

      sure it’s not just a recording? He told GW the same thing back in 2002.

  5. BanditBasheert June 5th, 2014 at 3:42 pm

    Van Jones caused Hurricane Katrina?

  6. granpa.usthai June 5th, 2014 at 4:49 pm

    As one who fully qualifies as a prophet of GoD! (pronounced with the B Graham high ending finalized D!) I believe Gwen’s lower tummy sensation is a Nazi plot hiding in the ridiculous microphone. It was Jim Jones, Jr.’s VAN that was used to drive him, Stephan and Tim to the US Embassy in Guyana.
    Jones van
    van Jones
    Nazis have the ability to swap words spoken through a ridiculous out dated microphone.

    • fahvel June 6th, 2014 at 4:04 am

      you made my morning G.

  7. fancypants June 5th, 2014 at 8:49 pm

    glen beck’s doctor is screwing with his meds again. This time its for tv amusement

  8. fancypants June 5th, 2014 at 8:58 pm

    Glen ! the crew was talking about how you look alot like the guy in the middle in the Producers. you always screw these things up

  9. genderman June 6th, 2014 at 3:12 pm

    God only talks to the First Presidency of the Mormon Church.