August 10, 2014 6:19 pm -


Jacko was truly wacko, according to tales told by his maids.

“Michael sometimes ran around where the animals were, and he’d track . . . poop throughout the house and think nothing of it,” Maid No. 1 recalled. “Then, if you said something, he’d threaten to make doo-doo snowballs and throw it at you.”

When Oprah Winfrey visited the Los Olivos, Calif., ranch for an interview in 1993, it was pristine. Floors were waxed, walls scrubbed and windows power-washed.

It was after she, guest Elizabeth Taylor and TV crews left the next morning that the real Jacko appeared.

“He literally peed on the floor of the entryway, right where you saw Oprah walk in. It was surreal. He just stood there, unzipped his trousers and watered the floor,” Maid No. 2 said.

Jackson had been relatively clean and orderly up until 1993, when 13-year-old Jordan Chandler became the first child to publicly accuse Jacko of molestation.

After molestation charges, Jacko turned.

“His whole life changed after 1993 when he had to pay that boy off. I’m telling you, he was the dirtiest, most unsanitary person in Hollywood,” Maid No. 3 said.

D.B. Hirsch
D.B. Hirsch is a political activist, news junkie, and retired ad copy writer and spin doctor. He lives in Brooklyn, New York.

25 responses to Michael Jackson ‘The Dirtiest, Most Unsanitary Person In Hollywood’

  1. ryan August 10th, 2014 at 6:55 pm

    Liberaland used to be where I came for a cogent liberal perspective on current events. Now since you have teamed up with freakoutnation you’re essentially a tabloid. I was a fan of FreakOut as well, but I always knew, when I went there, I would be getting a snarky, funny perspective on the news.

    You responded to my reservations on this issue right after your initial merger, Alan, but the results are in: This partnership blows.

    Sorry, your magazine has gone downhill for the simple reason that you were never designed to be a tabloid. FreakOut was. I don’t know what to think of Liberaland now. I think I just need to find something that is like how you used to be.

    • burqa August 10th, 2014 at 7:19 pm

      Did you see the story about the Obama-hating grafitti found on a couple buildings in North Carolina?

      • Anomaly 100 August 10th, 2014 at 7:40 pm

        I take it you object to that post?

    • Tommy6860 August 10th, 2014 at 7:41 pm

      And at FON, the motto was “We Inform, You Decide”. Your choice 🙂

    • Alan August 10th, 2014 at 7:56 pm

      Ryan, I think the combination brings the best of both worlds. Anomaly’s contributions have added spark and excitement to the site. Now you get the best of both sites all in one place. I understand that not everyone necessarily will see it that way.

      • Chris_Rose August 10th, 2014 at 11:16 pm

        That story about Michael Jackson has no redeeming value. It lowers the esteem of your site.

      • fahvel August 11th, 2014 at 2:51 am

        way off Alan – you are just covering your ass for having made an idiotic change – do you do less with the site than you did avant?

      • Spirit of America August 11th, 2014 at 4:54 am

        Split the site using subDomains & color code links… both sites would have the other sites links but Liberaland stories would be light blue, FO stories would be dark blue… writers could then submit stories to the appropriate site/style…people would know and could concentrate on their preference then and yet all the while the main domain would get the traffic hits and visitors. Folks would still get the ‘best of both sites’ yet it would be easy to stick to their ‘preference of style and content’. Lot of cross traffic that way as well.
        My view.

        • Anomaly 100 August 11th, 2014 at 10:37 am

          That’s worth considering. I appreciate your input! <3

          • mea_mark August 11th, 2014 at 11:00 am

            Because it is so hard to not read something and close the tab and move on …

          • Anomaly 100 August 11th, 2014 at 11:05 am

            I did email Alan with this suggestion. All input is valuable if it offers something other than a comment just slamming the site because they just feeling like screaming.

          • mea_mark August 11th, 2014 at 11:10 am

            There are already categories listed at the top of the front page, maybe we just need to add a couple more and do better about listing them where they belong.

          • Anomaly 100 August 11th, 2014 at 11:22 am

            Good point!

          • Spirit of America August 11th, 2014 at 12:16 pm

            I doubt anyone thinks it is hard, but for those with slower connections, and not all have hi-bandwidth connections, and those in a rush to get a ‘few stories in before the (fill in blank)’, it can be irritating. Generally speaking, a web site should cater to the visitor and anything that a website can do to have the visitor do less to get more will enhance it’s stickiness and popularity.

    • fahvel August 11th, 2014 at 2:50 am

      agreed 100%. This nit picking bunch of yackers makes what once was relatively intelligent sound like a 6th grade philosophy class.

      • Anomaly 100 August 11th, 2014 at 10:38 am

        You’re too kind.

        • mea_mark August 11th, 2014 at 11:02 am

          Philosophy class, my favorite. Not that is a compliment.

          • Anomaly 100 August 11th, 2014 at 11:03 am

            I really do appreciate constructive criticism because that’s how I learn, but his comment does not fall into that category.

  2. Roctuna August 10th, 2014 at 9:08 pm

    I’ve commented before about the tabloid nature of some stories. I don’t know where the line is exactly but I know it’s been crossed when I see it, and this story crosses it.

  3. BillTheCat45 August 10th, 2014 at 9:17 pm

    lol NY Post. Stopped reading there.

  4. fahvel August 11th, 2014 at 2:48 am

    he was cute at the Apollo and then he became a (caps lock) TRANSFORMER. It’s dead, let it be.

  5. roscoboxer August 11th, 2014 at 12:59 pm

    Do I think the maid is being truthful?
    I have my doubts
    Michael Jackson’s real mother was an alien, so I’ve read on a tabloid headline.
    So should I take anything in this here article seriously?

  6. pmbalele August 11th, 2014 at 3:31 pm

    How about Dr. Carson? I doubt if he takes a shower or brushes his teeth. Just look at his face. He is uncleansed person. No doubt the hospital fired him. And he hopes GOP and TPs will nominate him for WH job. He is a false dreamer.

  7. GunTotingLib August 11th, 2014 at 8:11 pm

    So falls under the category , who gives a frack

  8. Judgeforyourself37 August 11th, 2014 at 9:05 pm

    Are those stories true? Who knows? Maybe, maybe not, but he was certainly a deeply disturbed young man, with identity, drug and other mental health issues.