Potato Found Growing Inside A Woman’s Vagina
An unidentified woman sought medical attention after experiencing abdominal pains, according to Colombia Reports.
Medical staff in the central Colombian town of Honda were shocked after discovering a potato growing inside of a 22-year-old woman’s vagina. Because potatoes totally do not belong all up in there.
[su_center_ad]The woman explained that she had been advised by her mother to insert a potato into her vagina as a means of avoiding an unwanted pregnancy.
“My mom told me that if I didn’t want to get pregnant, I should put a potato up there, and I believed her,” she said. .
The potato remained lodged in her vajayjay for around 2 weeks when she began to experience intense pain in her lower abdomen.
According to the paper, the potato had germinated and grown roots inside the lady’s hoo hoo.
The nurse who examined the woman thought it was a practical joke, after finding roots emerging from the young woman´s lady parts. Until she saw an entire vegetable garden consisting of okra, tomatoes and corn stalks inside of the woman’s nether region.
The root vegetable was removed and surgery was not needed. There should be no lasting physical effects on the young woman.
In the 1990s, sexual education was mandatory in Colombia until parents who were shocked by the content of the classes protested against them and created groups such as the “Red Families” urging other parents to denounce the lessons in which teachers were accused of encouraging homosexuality.
So instead, there was a potato growing inside of a woman’s vagina because of an unnecessary fear of the gay community. And that’s why there should be sex ed classes in the states in order to avoid unwanted pregnancies, as well misinformation.
Remember Rick Santorum’s mega-donor, Foster Friess, who said, “On this contraceptive thing, my Gosh it’s such [sic] inexpensive.” He continued, “You know, back in my days, they used Bayer aspirin for contraception. The gals put it between their knees, and it wasn’t that costly.”
That’s also false. Potatoes go in the crisper. Aspirin belongs in the medicine cabinet.
H/T: @ComgenKDT with thanks. [su_csky_ad]
Jake October 5th, 2014 at 3:56 pm
I’m sure she could sell that potato for a fortune in Japan!
mea_mark October 5th, 2014 at 4:32 pm
I wonder if this can be considered organically grown?
Obewon October 5th, 2014 at 3:57 pm
She thought her daughter was a camel! Bedouins have long inserted pebbles into a camels uterus for contraception before a desert journey. http://en.muvs.org/topic/camel-contraception/
Carla Akins October 5th, 2014 at 3:58 pm
Twenty-two? Seriously?
Anomaly 100 October 5th, 2014 at 4:07 pm
For realsies.
mmaynard119 October 5th, 2014 at 7:52 pm
Why couldn’t she have been a Duggar?
Tammy Minton Haley October 5th, 2014 at 4:09 pm
i don’t know what to say about this…
i appear to be speechless…
StoneyCurtisll October 5th, 2014 at 5:07 pm
Tammy..
Sometimes, no comment is the best comment of all~!
Always good to see ya Tammy,..:)
Tell my friends over at MMfA I said hello!
Tammy Minton Haley October 5th, 2014 at 7:49 pm
🙂
rg9rts October 5th, 2014 at 4:10 pm
At least she didn’t stash her coke in there.
Vibiana October 5th, 2014 at 4:17 pm
Tater twats!
raincheck October 5th, 2014 at 5:17 pm
lol
KB723 October 5th, 2014 at 4:18 pm
I wonder what Mommy had to say about constipation???
raincheck October 5th, 2014 at 5:58 pm
It’s an old family remedy…. called the plunger
Denise October 5th, 2014 at 4:42 pm
gotta be republican. whatever happened to keeping your skirt down and legs closed? or birth control?
mea_mark October 5th, 2014 at 4:45 pm
Maybe right-wing conservative but I don’t think that is a whole lot of Republican activity in Columbia.
William October 5th, 2014 at 4:48 pm
There may actually be more to this story.
StoneyCurtisll October 5th, 2014 at 5:01 pm
Is that a potato?,,]
or are you just happy to see me?
StoneyCurtisll October 5th, 2014 at 5:04 pm
Take your hand off my tuber~!
🙂
raincheck October 5th, 2014 at 5:53 pm
OMG! lol… That will be on E-Bay by next week
mmaynard119 October 5th, 2014 at 6:38 pm
Hey, T2! They finally found it………
tiredoftea October 5th, 2014 at 7:06 pm
No, Anomaly’s other cat has been busy with it.
Carla Akins October 5th, 2014 at 7:11 pm
I was going to say, I don’t recall it being that color.
tiredoftea October 5th, 2014 at 7:16 pm
I’m thinking that Anomaly is getting it ready for Halloween.
Carla Akins October 5th, 2014 at 8:11 pm
So that’s why she needed the virgin blood and eye of newt.
tiredoftea October 5th, 2014 at 8:17 pm
I suppose. I hope she can find enough, it was pasty white when she got it.
StoneyCurtisll October 5th, 2014 at 4:59 pm
“The woman explained that she had been advised by her mother to insert a
potato into her vagina as a means of avoiding an unwanted pregnancy”…
I have to concur with the diagnosis..
Who would want to have have sex with a woman that has a “potato” in her vagina?
or even a cocoanut?
KB723 October 5th, 2014 at 5:01 pm
Well, since you had to throw in the coconut…. 😉
StoneyCurtisll October 5th, 2014 at 5:46 pm
hey..
Just between you and I…
I really dig your “kindBub” avatar!
KB723 October 5th, 2014 at 5:56 pm
Thanxz, it’s a bit dated, I created it in 2011… I have another one that I use for wordpress, hmm now that I think of it I have two…. =)
raincheck October 5th, 2014 at 5:52 pm
Or worse…. a carrot
mmaynard119 October 5th, 2014 at 6:42 pm
Rob Ford.
ChrisVosburg October 5th, 2014 at 5:53 pm
Insert “baby potato” joke here. Yeah, right up in here. Also:
One night mama went to fetch us up a sweet potato, fell down the cellar stairs,
Stork dropped in while she was on the floor, so my sister was born down there.
Daddy says this’n will be nothin’ but a misery, never will be worth a damn,
But mama just loved her little sweet potato baby, with a face like a parboiled yam.
Come on boys, Potato’s in the paddy wagon, gotta get her outta there,
Come on boys, Potato’s in the paddy wagon, mama says it just ain’t fair.
— “Potato’s in the Paddy Wagon,” Michael McKean, Annette O’Toole
raincheck October 5th, 2014 at 6:06 pm
How does your Garden grow… With Silver Bells, And Cockle Shells, and potato’s, And so my garden grows.
mmaynard119 October 5th, 2014 at 6:41 pm
If she was in Toyota, it would have been rice. If she was in Fiat, it would have been vermicelli. You have to be careful where you store your starchy foods these days.
Roctuna October 5th, 2014 at 6:48 pm
Combine this with the lab-grown penis technology and she gives birth to Mr. Potatohead.
tiredoftea October 5th, 2014 at 7:07 pm
And, the christian right everywhere in America is jealous.
Larry Schmitt October 5th, 2014 at 7:13 pm
Potatoes always did go with sausages.
mmaynard119 October 5th, 2014 at 7:50 pm
The prototype for the new Ms. Potato game proved not to be so popular.
M D Reese October 5th, 2014 at 7:52 pm
I could not read past the “insert a potato” part as a birth control method. It sounds like something that young girls might be advised to do in Texas.
mmaynard119 October 5th, 2014 at 7:59 pm
During the focus group tests, the Hide The Potato game did not prove as popular as the Hide The Salami game did with the 18 to 35 year old female demographic group.
burqa October 5th, 2014 at 8:37 pm
That tater come with butter or gravy?
Roctuna October 5th, 2014 at 9:15 pm
Oh burqa, how naughty.
neworleans878 October 5th, 2014 at 9:33 pm
Could have gone through the rest of my life quite happily without ever hearing this.
On the bright side, it did remind me that American Horror Story: Freak Show premiers this week. Thanks, Anomaly!
Aimee Elizabeth Shaw October 6th, 2014 at 12:39 am
Fish n Chips!
Marcus_Halberstram November 20th, 2014 at 3:33 pm
Nasty.
bpollen October 6th, 2014 at 7:20 am
This answers George Clinton’s timeless question… Do fries go with that shake?
hard2findu October 9th, 2014 at 8:48 pm
So she is going to have tater tots LOL