January 14, 2015 7:00 pm -

[su_right_ad]We’d also have unemployment below 6%. Oh, wait! That already happened. And gas would be under $2– oh, that happened too. According to carpetbagging Senate candidate Scott Brown, Romney would have stopped Ebola. And now some anonymous advisor says if only Romney were in the White House, there’s be no ISIS.

An unidentified advisor to Mitt Romney told the Boston Globe  that if the former Republican nominee had been elected President, there would be no Islamic State terror group in Syria and Iraq, and Russian leader Vladimir Putin would never have invaded Ukraine.

“There wouldn’t be an ISIS at all, and Putin would know his place in life,” the longtime aide told the Globe. “Domestically, things would be in better shape.”

And measles, mumps and chicken pox would be eradicated. And you’d always find a parking spot. And the Kardashians wouldn’t be on every magazine cover. Okay, I know that last one is asking too much.

Ann Romney said during the 2012 campaign, “Stop it. This is hard. You want to try it? Get in the ring.”

Oh, please do get in the ring again. This will be fun.  I recall Mitt wanted America to be mixed up in 5 wars simultaneously. If Romney had become President, there may not be an ISIS, because there wouldn’t be an America either.

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D.B. Hirsch
D.B. Hirsch is a political activist, news junkie, and retired ad copy writer and spin doctor. He lives in Brooklyn, New York.

5 responses to FreakOutNation-Romney Adviser: If Mitt Were President There’d Be No ISIS

  1. tracey marie January 14th, 2015 at 7:05 pm

    I really do hope old mittens joins the race to the baggerville nomination, I do so need a good laugh. With the bircher, the theocrat, the canadian and frothy as well as the dummy from Texas this will be good.

  2. StoneyCurtisll January 14th, 2015 at 7:25 pm

    If Mitt Romney Were President…
    We would all be living on planet Kolob~!

  3. peacedreamer January 14th, 2015 at 8:30 pm

    Mitt has & never has had any chance of being the POTUS. He’s like a badly written black & white tv commercial from the late 50s. However, it would be fun to see him make a fool of himself at the Cleveland convention. Last convention was a primetime hoot.
    Maybe this time he & his wife will bring their dog on top of the car & tell us how much he enjoys it. Maybe he’ll wear one of Darth Dick’s cowboy hats & speak with a southern accent while chewing on a piece of straw. He could wear green overall’s & an American flag tie.

    • Jack E Raynbeau January 14th, 2015 at 9:40 pm

      I was thinking more of a taxpayer subsidized dancing horse.

  4. burqa January 14th, 2015 at 10:22 pm

    If Romney were president, the heartbreak of psoriasis would be cured forEVER!