May 11, 2015 8:00 am -


Conspiracy theory swindler Alex Jones is playing ABC News like a violin — a violin wrapped in tin-foil. Sunday morning, Jones, a radio talk show host who’s made millions by exploiting the paranoia of his listeners, was scheduled to be interviewed by Martha Raddatz on ABC’s This Week regarding the hoopla surrounding the Jade Helm 15 story. When the time came for the live satellite interview, Jones was nowhere to be found, leading the host to announce that Jones was a “no show.”

Let’s rewind.

If you’ve been following Chez Pazienza’s coverage here or the ongoing (and hilarious) updates on the Stephanie Miller Show, you’re already up to speed. But in case you’re just joining us, Jade Helm 15 is an unclassified series of military training exercises conducted by the U.S. Army Special Operations Command (SOC) involving Army Green Berets, Navy SEALs and other units, including special operators from the Air Force, and taking place in Colorado, Arizona, Utah, New Mexico and Texas this coming July through September. Last month, the Pentagon released a map of where Jade Helm will be taking place and, on the map, Texas is labeled “hostile territory.” Clearly, however, the label is arbitrary for the purposes of the exercises. All of the land being used in Jade Helm was chosen for its unique topography, and it’s all private land used with permission of the landowners.

Naturally, Jade Helm is red meat for a succubus like Alex Jones who immediately burrowed into the story.

Right off the bat, Jones told his disciples that the U.S. military was readying itself to declare and enforce martial law and basically take over Texas. Later, he backpedaled a little and said it wasn’t immediate martial law, but that is was an incremental step toward it. Either way, Jones is galactically deceiving his listeners who invariably accept anything he says at face value. Last week, hordes of Jones listeners and various other cranks and weirdos descended upon a Bastrop, TX County Commissioners meeting where SOC commander Lt. Col. Mark Lastoria patiently tolerated bug-eyed rants and Godwin-trampling Nazi references from yokels who made the Springfield townspeople from The Simpsons look comparatively reasonable.

Back to the ABC News fracas… CONTINUE READING



D.B. Hirsch
D.B. Hirsch is a political activist, news junkie, and retired ad copy writer and spin doctor. He lives in Brooklyn, New York.